Learning From Our Mistakes

I think mothers should be saluted! Afterall, they get persecuted, misunderstood, blamed for being ruthless when in fact, they were trying to do everything out of love, albeit against the wishes of their children.

As Clarissa grows, I realize that we have more issues to argue about. Over the past year, it was over her computer playing time. Admittedly, I was soft hearted and wanted to give her what she wanted (this is love, no?). But alas, her grades at school starting falling. As a result, I had to drastically limit her games’ playing time. In exchange, I became her “most hated” person for the day(s)! How could I be loved at one moment for being permissible and became hated the next, over the very same issue? Didn’t she know that spending more time in games than in her schoolwork would cause the latter to suffer? Apparently not.

As a mother, I struggled over loving my child the way she would like to and she should be. It would have been easier for me to say no right at the beginning when the request was presented. However, as a typical mother, I take risks and hope for the best. Sometimes, it worked out but on times that it didn’t, I wished that I had done things differently.

I guess this must be how it is with God. Knowing that something could hurt us more than benefit us, He allows us the sacred gift of choice. When we make the wrong choices, we blame Him who made us but forgot that it was us, who stubbornly pursue our desires.  It wasn’t until I became a parent that I realize how much our wrong actions must have hurt Him. Still, He pursued us and loved us. Our Heavenly Father deserves our salutation. Indeed, He who never fails had to put up with our consistent failure. It would have been easier for Him to take away our free will but He didn’t.

My greatest joy is when Clarissa chooses to obey me, despite knowing that she could have done otherwise. To help her catch up with her school work, both her tuition teacher & I have to spend hours coaching her, motivating her to do extra reading and exercises. Initially, she was reluctant but when she sees that her hard work pays off, she began to put in the hours willingly. Her recent exams results were an indication that she had improved. Although she was both pleasantly surprised and happy by her new grades, I was the one who was kept awake at night, smiling at the thought that she had learnt from her mistake! I have always wondered if God too would be smiling down at me when I have learnt from my mistake but after last night, I have no doubt that He does too.